A thousand miles from home...

I am not the type to normally obsess over issues. I normally can read about a sad story  or a story that would make you mad, and let it go. Check up on it again later on (if I remember), but it doesn't really stay on my mind. Until this one. You may or may not have heard of the story of "Veronica Capobianco" out of Charleston, South Carolina. This is a heart wrenching story of a little girl, who had been living with her potential adoptive parents in Charleston, for the past 2 years, and on January 31, 2012, she was put into a truck and driven 1100 miles away from the only parents she has ever known, by her biological father. I encourage you to go here and read the full story. It is one that will stick with you. Or maybe not.

I keep wondering to myself, why this story won't  leave me, and perhaps it is because Owen and Veronica are the same age. They are probably reaching the same milestones, etc. And, I know how he is developmentally--emotional and physical. So I can't help but think of her.

When I first read this story, I got sick. Physically sick, I couldn't stop thinking about this little girl, being stripped away from the ONLY family she has ever known, and put into a truck with complete strangers. I thought about her. What is going through her mind? Did she cry from SC to OK? My mind was flooded with questions, and I was sick to my stomach. I then stepped back, and decided that I would approach this with an open mind. Because, every story has 2 sides, right?! So, I "liked" the Save Veronica Rose Facebook page, I read up on things there, I read the ICWA of 1978 law, I conducted some brief research. I  then found a Keep Veronica Home Facebook page. I began to look at them both, for answers. Comparing sides. Of course at this point on Facebook, it is a he said/she said battle. But one thing rings true. Those who are fighting to get Veronica back to South Carolina, are more genuine. They care, for her. They are truly working to correct this outdated law, and especially working to get Veronica back home. Home, as in the only place that she has ever lived, with the only people she has ever known to love her. Where as the "supporters" of the biological dad, are angry, revengeful, and just hurtful. And, I cannot imagine Veronica being raised in that type of environment. 

I don't have a professional opinion about this case other than my educational background, and what I can for a fact state in the early childhood development scope of things but, this is what I DO know...

• Last weekend, I took Owen (my 2 year old) to Savannah to visit my sister. (4 hours away) As we approached Columbia (2 hours in the drive) he had already asked for his daddy 15 times. At this point in the drive he meant it. By the time we reached Walterboro (3 hours in the drive) he was screaming and crying in the back seat, for his dad. He wanted to go home. In his words "I go home mommy, I want my daddy". And, he knows me, I have raised him (along with my husband) from his first breath.  But, he still wanted to go home, and see his daddy. So, imagine being Veronica, and put into a truck within 30 minutes of meeting her biological father, a stranger, and driven 1100 miles away! My heart breaks.
• Bonds are made early. And, at this age, they are beginning to trust. So imagine being forced to leave the home you have been raised in since birth, with NO explanation. Who/How do you trust now?
• Regardless of your opinion of who is right, and who is wrong....there was no transition period. There was no time to let her "get to know" him. There was no time, for him to "get to know" her. She is as much as a stranger to him, as he is to her. She doesn't know him from Adam, and he doesn't know her favorite food, favorite book, or how she likes to fall asleep at night. SAD.
• The ICWA was abused in this case. It might have been perfect for the time it was written, 1978. But, in this particular case, it was abused and misused.

I'm not going to sit and write about everything I am thinking about this case. I feel like everyone has a right to form their own opinions in cases like these, but I can assure you, no matter how much you sugar coat it, no matter how often his supporters chant "she's doing fine, she's playing with her sister, etc..."  She is not fine. She is hurting. And, she will have issues later in life, if her sense of normalcy isn't returned to her soon. And, IN MY OPINION her sense of normalcy is in Charleston, SC, with Matt and Melanie Capobianco.

Like I said at the start of this post. I don't normally think much about cases like these, and I definitely don't blog about them. But, this one has struck a chord with me. If you want more information, please check out the website Save Veronica or if you are on Facebook, then look up Save Veronica Rose (for the side of the adoptive parents) and Keep Veronica Home (for those in Support of Mr. Brown). I encourage you to look at both sides, and form your own opinion. I also encourage you to sign the petition, so that lawmakers will revisit the ICWA law of 1978, and make the necessary changes to prevent this heartache from happening to any other families.

I have faith. Faith, that she will be back home soon. The SC Supreme Court has decided to hear the case, I just hope it is sooner than later. I just have to keep telling myself, that she will come home. And, as a parent, I cannot imagine what her PARENTS--the ones who have been there since birth-- are going through.

In the meantime, pray :)